Elena wasn’t much of a risk-taker.

A’s plastered her report card. She played games she knew she could win. She played soccer because it came easy and had been crowned team captain ever since she was a kid. She would never deviate from an Ivy League school and Yale was where the next four years would take her. She didn’t color outside the lines and parked in spots she knew she could get into. Everyone in her class deemed her perfect, and she despised it. But Sophie didn’t see her that way. And if Sophie didn’t see her that way, she didn’t care.

 

Elena groaned as she slipped on her satin green prom dress that shimmered. Ruki sat at her vanity, plucking her eyebrows. She wore a red qipao. “Quit your groaning, Elena,” Ruki teased, as she went hair by hair. “This is our last outing as seniors. Our last moment together before graduation. Happy faces only!”

 

“It’s the 21st century and we’re still expecting boys to ask out girls. It just feels like an outdated practice, that’s all I’m saying.” Elena couldn’t stand the idea of prom, but Sophie, Ruki, and Quinn loved prom, which means she loved prom by default because that’s what she believed best friends do.

“Well that’s why you change the norms,” Ruki shrugged.

“What are we arguing about out now?” Quinn asked as they walked into Elena’s room. Ruki and Elena’s mouths hung open. Their hazel locks were gone for a buzzcut, and they were donning a suit.

Ruki ran up and pecked Quinn’s lips. “You look great.”

“I can’t believe you finally did it, Q! Is it as freeing as you thought it’d be?” Elena asked

“I feel like I can finally breathe, actually,” Quinn said.

 

“Elena! My curls are falling!” Sophie lamented from the bathroom. Sophie didn’t know a thing about either hair or makeup. But she did know Charles Dickens like the back of her hand, which Elena loved. As Sophie ran out of the bathroom, she exclaimed, “Quinn! Your hair!” Sophie flailed about it. “It looks so good!”

 

Elena felt the air stuck in her throat looking at Sophie in her brown dress. Her honey-brown hair, fair skin, and blue eyes contrasted with Elena’s olive complexion and dark waves. Sophie always felt like more than her best friend. She couldn’t exactly clock when that started to change. Maybe it was when she started to get a whiff of her perfume and it would send her stomach into somersaults. Or maybe it’s when Sophie got an obnoxious boyfriend and envy ate at her.

 

Sophie noticed Elena staring and asked, “What? Do I look bad? Is my hair that bad?”

Elena smiled, and said, “Soph, you look great. Let’s check out the hair situation.” They all crowded into Elena’s bathroom, and she examined Sophie’s fallen curls. “I can fix this,” Elena said simply with a smile. She spun Sophie around and grabbed the curling iron she seldom used.

 

Elena may have loved Sophie from the very first day they met in sixth grade. She fondly remembered when Sophie joined herself, Ruki, and Quinn in science. She was the new girl. She sat next to Elena and listened quietly as Elena and her friends chatted away about soccer. And when Sophie finally spoke, that’s when the flutters began. Elena knew Sophie hated soccer. She never understood why Sophie played. But maybe it was the same reason she was dragging herself to prom.

 

“Ugh, fucking Jessica,” Ruki said with disdain as she scrolled her phone. She showed them the prom picture to the group. “She was so obsessed with getting into Kevin’s pants and she cost us nationals. You can’t convince me otherwise.”

“Babe, I don’t think that’s very feminist of you,” Quinn joked.

 

“Then I’m not very feminist either, because she needed to pull her head out of her ass,” Elena said. She didn’t joke about soccer. She went piece by piece through Sophie’s hair. She held onto one piece. She turned her attention to Quinn and Ruki. “She’s been obsessed with the boy who stuck pencils up his nose until the eighth grade. That’s who she was pining over?!”

 

“Guys…” Sophie laughed. “We were never going to make nationals. Jessica or not!”

“I would shove you if you didn’t have a curling iron in your hair right now!” Ruki said. Quinn wrinkled their nose. Ruki’s eyes went wide. Elena turned around to see smoke coming from Sophie’s hair.

 

“Elena!” Sophie exclaimed as she noticed what was happening.

“Shit!” Elena yelled as she released Sophie’s curl. She gently ran her fingers through it. The heat made her fingers flinch.

 

Sophie closed her eyes, fearful of the outcome. “Elena, please do not tell me we’re having a Little Women moment.” Elena frantically continued examining Sophie’s hair.

“Nope! It’s good!” Elena jumped and beamed. “We are all good! No lost hair!”

Ruki and Quinn cheered, and Sophie leaned into the bathroom counter in relief.

 

“Okay, good. Are we all almost ready?” Sophie asked the group. “I think Ben should be here soon.” Elena refrained from rolling her eyes. She hated hearing about Ben, Sophie’s boyfriend since freshman year. Whatever she saw in Ben was utterly questionable; the boy made laughed at the word penis. But she knew her judgment was tainted by so much more than childhood memories.

​

“Yeah, let’s get going,” Ruki said and linked arms with Quinn. “We’ll meet you gals downstairs.”

As the two left, Elena turned and gave Sophie a knowing smile. “What’s the quote of the day?” It started in the seventh grade as Sophie began devouring more complex literature. It’s not that Elena didn’t care about reading. She devoured books, but Sophie was a girl of the classics.

 

“It’s prom! Don’t I get a break, Elena!” Sophie teased. “Okay, okay. Ready yourself for this one.” Sophie tilted her head up and put on a fancy voice. “I am no bird; and no net ensnares me: I am a free human being with an independent will. From the classic Jane Eyre, by our fierce Charlotte Bronte.”

 

Elena clapped, and Sophie took a bow. “Okay, let’s go, Elena!”

“Wait, wait!” Elena grabbed her arm. She dug into one of her drawers and pulled out some blush. She titled Sophie’s face up, and she noticed that her cheeks flushed. It only made Elena’s stomach flutter. But she composed herself and dabbed some blush onto Sophie’s cheeks. Elena admired her for a moment. “You look beautiful, Soph,” Elena said simply.

 

“Says the stunner,” Sophie rolled her eyes. She smiled at Elena and then blushed as she looked down. “Thanks, El.”

“Let’s get going,” Elena nodded towards the door and led the way out.

​

****

​

Elena hated pictures, but she let her family gush over her and her friends for a bit until the driver dropped them off at the hotel in the city where the prom was being held. The second they all stepped out of the car, Ben had sauntered off with his group of friends and resigned to a boozy night in the bathroom. To Elena’s surprise, Sophie remained in good spirits. Elena linked arms with her best friends, and they ran to the dance floor. She didn’t care much for dancing and crowds, but she enjoyed jumping along with her friends. They danced for an hour until Sophie noticed Ben stumbling around.

 

“Fuck. I have to go handle that,” Sophie said. Before Elena could interject, she ran off. Ruki noticed as Elena kept her eyes trained on the heated argument ensuing between the two.

“Am I missing something?” Quinn loudly whispered into Ruki’s ear. “Elena’s staring at Sophie and you’re staring at Elena.”

 

Ruki patted Quinn’s shoulder. “Babe, you are so innocent, and I love you for it.” Ruki snapped at Elena’s face and said, “Earth to Elena!” Elena turned her attention back to the two of them.

“Sorry!” Elena said. “I just wanted to keep an eye on Soph.”

 

The three of them continued dancing together, but Elena couldn’t take her eyes off Sophie. Ruki stopped dancing and grabbed Elena’s arm. Quinn followed after them as Ruki dragged Elena into the lobby. Ruki crossed her arms as she stared at Elena.

“What did I do!” Elena joked. “I’ve had a happy face all night.”

“I have held my tongue since sixth grade, Elena!”

“About?”

“What’s happening right now?” Quinn asked, confused.

“An intervention,” Ruki said, not breaking eye contact with Elena. “Don’t play dumb, Elena.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

“Sophie, Elena.”

“What about Sophie?”

Ruki gaped at her. “Elena! How many times do I have to say your name tonight!”

“What!”

Ruki sighed. “Everyone sees the way you look at Sophie. Quinn, don’t you see the way Elena looks at Sophie?”

Quinn sighed and smiled. They started to back away to the banquet hall. “Ah, I see what’s happening now.”

“See, even Quinn knows!” Ruki exclaimed.

“I don’t look at Sophie in any way, Ruki. She’s my best friend.”

“You like, maybe even love, Sophie.”

“God, you sound like my mothers, Ruki.”

“Exactly. You have two moms, and you have this weird internalised homophobia going on.”

“I have no issues with being queer, Ruki.”

“Then what is it, El?”

“Where is this coming from?”

 

“It’s coming from the fact we are graduating! Everything is going to change. I’m not naive. I know we’re all going to change and our relationships will be different. But do you want to sit around and wonder ‘what if’ all the time? You don’t put yourself out there. You’ve never put your heart out on the line, Elena. I get it’s scary, but I worry about you.”

“Again, you sound like my mothers.”

“And your mothers have something really special. Don’t you want something like that? Because I think if you gave it a chance with Sophie –”

“You’re still assuming what you’re saying is right.” Elena shrugged.

“Just take the risk!” Ruki begged. “It’s all I ask.”

Quinn ran up to the two of them. “Ben just broke up with Sophie!

Ruki and Elena’s eyes went wide. To all of their surprise, Sophie approached them with a smile on her face. They all stayed quiet. “I’m good, guys.”

“Are you sure?” Ruki asked.

“Yeah,” Sophie said. She turned her attention to Elena. “I’m just going to sit outside for a bit.” Sophie set out, and Elena remained standing with Ruki and Quinn.

“Elena,” Ruki said. “Go.”

Elena sighed. “I am only going to make sure she’s okay. That’s it.”

—

Elena knew what Sophie liked. She wasn’t surprised to find her sitting outside on a bench gazing at the sky. Sophie always talked about how it wasn’t even for stars. She liked the moon. Elena crept up. She felt a chill and went to rub her arms. She kept her arms wrapped around as she called out, “Soph?”

 

Sophie smiled and patted the bench for her to sit. Elena walked over and sat next to her. They sat in silence as they looked at the moon together. Elena thought often of what her mother taught her. There’s beauty in silence, especially when it can fall between two people who deeply know and understand one another. It was never uncomfortable, and it felt like peace. And that often fell between her and Sophie.

 

“I’m sorry, Soph,” Elena said. She wrapped her arm around her and Sophie settled her head onto Elena’s shoulder.

“It’s fine,” Sophie said.

“You don’t seem too upset.”

“Because I’m not. It was a high school love affair. Those seldom work out.”

 

That stung Elena a bit. Sophie picked up her head and said, “Our relationship though, that will outlast Dickens and Shakespeare.” She laughed as she said, “They’ll write epic tales of our love.”

She caught it all. Relationship. Love. She wondered if this was Sophie’s way of being brave. Elena reached for Sophie’s hand. She was pleasantly surprised when she didn’t yank it away. Her fingers were slightly locked with hers. Sophie smiled a bit. Both of their faces were turning red.

“Hit me with a great literary quote,” Elena said.

 

“Elena, my quota is one a day,” Sophie joked. She gazed up at the moon. Elena saw the bit of courage it took for her. Sophie took a deep breath and carefully started, “You pierce my soul. I am half agony. Half hope.” Sophie peered over at Elena. “Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever.” She peered her gaze back up to the moon.” Jane Austen.”

Silence resumed, and their hands stayed locked. Sophie quietly asked, “Why is this so hard for us?”

 

“Because,” Elena shrugged, “change is… scary.” Sophie was a person she loved, and always wanted around. She didn’t want that to change. But she saw how it worked out for her auntie and her wife. She saw how it worked out for her mama and amma. You can’t live your life in fear. It’s what her mothers told her often enough. “But you’re my favorite person, Sophie. That could never change.”

“This is risky business, Elena,” Sophie smirked. “You’re not a girl of risk.”

“You’ve got jokes at a time like this?” Elena laughed.

“At a time like what?” Sophie joked.

​

“I’m not sure I want to kiss you now,” Elena said. She was surprised at how bold she was.

“I’d prefer to kiss either Jane Austen or Emily Dickinson,” Sophie teased. “But I could settle.”

Elena smiled coyly and got closer to Sophie’s face. “You’ve got jokes when you’re nervous, Sophie.”

Maybe it was her mother on her mind. Maybe it was Ruki’s confrontation. Maybe it was Sophie’s admission. But she felt brave as she placed both her hands on Sophie’s cheeks and pulled her in. Her lips lasted like vanilla and her face felt soft. It was sweet. It was simple. It felt like coming home and sent her head spinning all at once. She felt Sophie’s hands stroking her cheeks. They pulled apart after a minute.

 

As they pulled apart again, Elena looked into Sophie’s eyes. She sighed and smiled.

“Well, look at that,” Elena shook her head. “I guess you’re a risk I’m willing to take.”